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Thursday, December 22, 2005
Thursday, December 15, 2005
Oh my I just realized
I had no idea I would spend a week in the hospital laying in wait for a "blessed event"... I think I bonded more with a pre-born Squink at that time than before.
I remember being terrified and scared and excited.
I still will never forget how awful it was when the nurse in the OB triage said..."well it looks like you are going to have a baby tonight"... I think that is as close as I have ever come to being histerical... I started crying and said no, it will be premature. I think that freaked her out too.
Goodness, no wonder I am so behind... I have been out of practice for a couple of years.
Tuesday, December 06, 2005
The question:
1) meeting someone that was born in another country and has a certificate of birth abroad,
2) volunteering,
3) a cupcake with buttercream frosting,
4) a pretty wildflower,
And most importantly;
5) My son!
Sunday, December 04, 2005
Friday, December 02, 2005
Oh yeah...
?
The one thing I knew he had of mine and it is going away...
Arty Kid |
Whether you were a drama freak or an emo poet, you definitely were expressive and unique. You're probably a little less weird these days - but even more talented! |
Sunday, November 27, 2005
When hell freezes over
Thursday, November 24, 2005
Happy Thanksgiving!
Indeed."So, happy thanksgiving and think about the fact that you may be here because generations ago someone fed a stranger."
Wow
Yes.
Happy Thanksgiving.
Saturday, November 19, 2005
I am on a mission from sock monkey
sock monkey respite
Originally uploaded by Blair Necessities.
Almost two years ago my dear friend Sarah and I took our sock monkies on a little jaunt to Prescott (pronounced by locals as Press-Cuht). The photo above is from when our sockmonkies joined us for a brief stop at a cafe for some capuccinos and scones. They were most agreeable, especially since we had promised to take them to the saloon (aka pub, bar) on Historic Whiskey Row immediately after. (more pictures on flickr)
OK, since it is known that I love sock monkey and have even given one to Squink... I am now tasked with trying to get sock monkey to tango.
Friday, November 18, 2005
A birthday toast for Nana
Thursday, November 17, 2005
Last years was much better, but that may be because I was bound and determined to get out of the house at least once while on bed rest. This year, Squink went with us in his jammies and in a sling and he was one happy boy. Who knew he would like spanokopita so much. The caterers were fabulous and so very kind to Squink... one even would come looking for me when they thought they had a food he could try to eat. Squink lasted about two hours and got tired and not so cranky, but cranky enough for me to know it was time to go home.
We returned home to a paint fume free house and were thrilled. Squink went right to bed and I got to speak with my sister in law.
Forgive the similarity to the house blog, but it was really all related so I used parts for each blog.
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
Sunday, November 13, 2005
tears
I have removed public viewing priviledges of all pictures of your children from anything I have on line. Since I see them so rarely, I will keep my access to them. I hope this does not upset you.
I love your children with all my heart and will do anything to protect them. They are treasures and very special individuals. I am proud to be their aunt.
Most sincerely,
Blair
Saturday, November 12, 2005
Manara (as in a male tiara) AKA crown
Manara AKA crown
Originally uploaded by Blair Necessities.
While The Girl is the loveliest of all tiara wearing creatures that grace this planet. I am all in favor of the introduction of the Manara. So wonderfully demonstrated here by his Royal Squinkness.
Friday, November 11, 2005
Thursday, November 10, 2005
What Advanced Degree Should I Get?
Via Mrs. Ootfp
Thanks for the reminder
You Should Get a MD (Doctor of Medicine) |
You're both compassionate and brilliant - a rare combination. You were born to be a doctor. |
Tuesday, November 08, 2005
Sparkling Sequin Tiara
Why, you ask?
Well, it is because I now have this power:
And here is the proof that it is flame retardant!
That or I masquerade a damn good favorite actress...
uhm, what actress wears a tiara?
I am the awesomest queen ever...
no, wrong gender for the kind that live in this country anyway
I am Miss America...
can't be that I am married...
Sunday, November 06, 2005
Tintin
PICT0644
Originally uploaded by Blair Necessities.
Squinks hair has an interesting growing pattern, so much so that sometimes I think it looks like this Tintin.
descanso
descanso
Originally uploaded by Blair Necessities.
Often as I drive I find these little descansos (a resting place, usually at the site where someone has died). I am always struck by them. They are rather common where I grew up. I was struck by this one, and made my mother go back so I could take a closer look. There were stuffed animals and seating areas. It seems a place where several eople could go and remember the person that paswsed away. It was amazingly elaborate. I was touched, and I don't even know who it was made for.
Papa, I can ride all by myself
PICT0614
Originally uploaded by Blair Necessities.
We took the squink to a restaurant today that had a childrens table with saddles for the chairs. So, in a fit of trying to make sure Squink is true to his cowboy roots and so we put him on one. He was so excited, and seems to really have a good seat in the saddle... so it is not a surprise that he also got a fierce independent burst and wanted to ride all by his lone...
My tiara
PICT0651
Originally uploaded by Blair Necessities.
In a comments conversation with Mrs. Ootfp I mentioned my lovely new tiara. I wore it proudly today... in the house. But I plan on making one of the ones she shared here.
Wednesday, October 26, 2005
Tuesday, October 25, 2005
Saturday, October 22, 2005
Just for Agnes
Squink with teeth
Originally uploaded by Blair Necessities.
OK, so it is somewhat hard to see them, but here is a picture of his teeth!
Life as I know it...
Well, let me tell you...
The laptop is what was my lifeline during bedrest, I love my laptop, and though it may technically be called ours, it is mine...
the flat screen was a Christmas present and the other...
Well, it was too cheap to pass up and so we thought why not... that way when my mom stays with us we can each sit at a computer and ignore eachother like any good American family in the technical age.
In other news, Schatz and I are trying to start a German school, there is not really a weekday school here that serves the purpose of providing a language based European education so we are working with the German government as well as the local Swiss, Austrian and German consuls to start one. We may have found a partner school/church and it is very very exciting! The school was designed by Frank Lloyd Wright, so the location is architecturally interesting. It is not in an area where most of the German, Austrian or Swiss parents live, but it is close to freeways. We are excited none the less, and since we will be uniform based, I will pick one based on my own personal experience with El Colegio Aleman (my German school in South America).
Sunday, October 16, 2005
My dear little J1
Picture removed per second party request.
Happy birthday sweet little one!
I remember visiting you when you were born, a delightful treat from bed rest and gazing into your gorgeous eyes and watching your big brother be so excited about being a big brother. My thoughts are with you this weekend, I just wish I could tell you how much I love you!
But,
I love you!
Happy First Birthday!!!!
Saturday, October 15, 2005
Josef visiting with Malcom and His Mommy
Josef visiting with Malcom and His Mommy
Originally uploaded by Blair Necessities.
Malcom had his first birthday and we had so much fun. Especially mommy since she finally got to touch and hold Malcom. Josef had fun and likes cake a lot!
HAPPY BIRTHDAY MALCOM!!!
Tuesday, October 11, 2005
he just has that glow about him
he just has that glow about him
Originally uploaded by Blair Necessities.
I like this picture of Squink! Since we are now (both) feeling better... I thought I could share at the very least this...
Sunday, October 09, 2005
PUKE!
Heck, he has been so happy other than that, that I tend to believe her... Especially since all that blood stuff seems to be resolving itself rather nicely!
Poor little one!
Monday, October 03, 2005
Squink and Uncle B
Squink and Uncle B
Originally uploaded by Blair Necessities.
For your viewing pleasure... a picture of my uber cool brother (one of them anyway) with the squink!
Friday, September 30, 2005
Guilt
Guilt - the jewish (happy new year BTW) invented it, the catholics perfected it and the mormons marketed it...
OK. Having said that...
Squink fell last night!
I feel tremendous guilt, though he has nary a bruise on him! It was awful and it is shocking how these sort of things can happen.
Oy vey, saints preserve me!
Sunday, September 25, 2005
Another rather interesting meme
1. Delve into your blog archive.
2. Find your 23rd post (or closest to).
3. Find the fifth sentence (or closest to).
4. Post the text of the sentence in your blog along with these instructions.
5. Tag five people to do the same.
and got this:
The results:
0
Since I do not follow directions and will not even follow a recipe (yes even a baking one) to its exact specifications... I will forgo rule 5 other than to say" I tag you, and you, and you, you, and you! You know who you are...
On a side note my brother is coming to visit (half brother really but I am rounding up because he is so totally marvelous and all) today! This is the brother that is 14 years younger and also speaks with a rather poshish British accent so no one believes we are related even though we look somewhat related!
My sweet (or sour) pickle boy
My sweet (or sour) pickle boy
Originally uploaded by Blair Necessities.
Sucking on his first kosher dill pickle (after a giant Motza Ball) at the Miracle Mile Deli.....and Squink is loving it.
Wednesday, September 21, 2005
Malcom
Mal_in_da_tub
Originally uploaded by Blair Necessities.
So here is Squinks first roomate all grown up and getting his hair cleaned up! OK, I am pretty biased, but this here boy is one cutie pie!
Not my lucky number
We are shooting for getting twelve, but I am very happy with the seven.
Doctor appt in a nutshell, I have a long skinny boy... no word on the bloodwork yet! Let us hope that is over, no more specialist visits please! Looks like a lefty, and a slight frown from the doc when it was revealed that he does not imitate... should he?
Saturday, September 17, 2005
My own desert
I had a horrible fever this past week, and I am now finding that I am drying up...
I find this so sad and depressing. I don't want to stop and last night Squink and I were awake all night and he just kept trying to nurse and I am assuming he just was not getting enough because he was fussy and crying that I finally opened my reserve can of formula and made him a bottle. I cried as I was putting it together as it was something I was so hoping that I would not have to do it... I am going to try to see if I can bring up "my dairy production" but he has now had two formula bottles... that he finished in seconds and gobbled up like he had not eaten in a week. I just feel somewhat helpless here, I don't want him to starve so that I get more milk faster. Perhaps it is because I am an office job mother... but... I am just so sad about this... it has been my favorite time with the squink.
If I were an artist I would want to paint this... not sure why, but the way I feel seems like it needs an image to go along with the desperation of possibly losing the ability to breastfeed...
Apropo
~Buddha
Tuesday, September 13, 2005
I am because we are
I liked the idea that came to my mind, something like the "it takes a village" (before the H. Clinton bastardization of it anyway).
So I googled the expression and I read more on the "origins" and have become much more intrigued.
Race relations have always interested me, not because I see people as different based on skin color or ethnicity, but because I have felt myself so flummoxed by the whole idea that people do that at all. I see people as parts of a whole, that there is not a "right way" nor necessarily even a "wrong way" (criminal minds and such being an exception)... I don't love people because they are white, or brown, or red, or black.... I love them because they have spoken to my soul and equally, I don't dislike someone because they are white or brown, or red, or black.... but because they have tried to hurt my soul. It is only when they have hurt me because of the color of my skin or even because of theirs that this may even become an issue, this does not happen often.
I know not everyone sees the world as I do, some people may like having ethnic enclaves, and since I have no real country to call "home" I consider everyone my sister and brother, that I am "in it" with them, in an attempt to make life bearable and joyous, and as with family, relationships are hard and must be worked on, it is just sad when folks don't want to work on them with me, but then, that is their perogative... sadly, not everyone sees anyone as a family member in their life.
The article I link to in my header talks about dehumanization... I have often pondered if there may not be such. But then, the book it is reviewing apparently speaks on race relations and the African American diaspora from a North American view (though the Caribbean and Afria have contributing writers). Race, in my experience in South America was profoundly different. We did not base social relationships on race as much as two other factors; class (the haves and have nots) and region (the coastal folks and the mountain folks). It could be equally as ugly as racism.
Monday, September 12, 2005
The Magnificent Seven
Seven Things I Plan To Do Before I Die:
1. Live in South America again
2. Finish Medical School
3. Live in Europe again
4. Visit places I haven't seen
5. Learn to trick ride a horse
6. Raise a strong yet kind child(ren)
7. Nurture my inner bohemian
Seven Things I Can Do:
1. Think abstractly
2. Think outside the box
3. Plan things
4. Learn painful lessons
5. Speak Spanish
6. Be very generous
7. Put things together correctly without reading the directions
Seven Things I Can't Do:
1. Clean house (though not for a lack of trying)
2. Put a car engine back together (not that I have ever tried)
3. Forgive myself (at least I don't do it very well)
4. Write anything for "pleasure" without feeling like a huge dork
5. Get a manicure (the feeling of having nail polish on my nails for more than 4 hours is very disturbing)
6. Pay for things I know I can get for free
7. Keep my mouth shut
Seven Things That Attract Me to People:
1. Generosity
2. Kindness
3. Beauty (inner and outer but of my definition)
4. Joy of life
5. Skepticism
6. Honor (but not among thieves)
7. Respect for those who are weaker
Seven Things I Say Most:
1. Squinky
2. Schatzy
3. Uhm...
4. The Sky, the moon, the stars (when asked what's up)
5. You crack me up like an egg
6. Let's blow this popsicle joint
7. Hey, Hey, Hey... when I hear people cuss
Seven Celebrity Crushes:
1. Andrew McCarthy
2. Duckie
3. Daniel Lapaine
4. W.B. Yeats
5. Bobby Burns
6. Moritz, but more of in a grandfatherly way
7. Clint Eastwood
Since early hours of sky really impressed me with the following one I am somewhat copying her in a vain attempt at flattery...
Seven People I am tagging:
If you haven'’t had (pick one)
1. A Doctor visit that required a blood draw in the last week
2. Any fast food today
3. A bagel for breakfast
4. Written a blog post today
5. Complained about your neighbor
6. To run an errand but couldn't make it
7. Anything to do and as such may desire to do so...
Friday, September 02, 2005
Katrina
All my friends and loved ones there are accounted for as of ten minutes ago, though they are in shock and seemingly broken in spirit.
I look at the footage and just feel overwhelmed. I am so reminded of the life I had in South America. It is chaos of the nature of a third world country. I hope that there are more shining examples of humanity happening than the horror stories of rape and personal looting... though I have to admit that if I were there and saw any starving children I would loot in a heartbeat, if I were there with Squink, I would loot in a heart beat... it is the harm that they seem to be causing each other that is just so devastating.
I am just so saddened by this situation... in so many ways and on so many levels.
Tuesday, August 30, 2005
What a difference a year can make
Following that pronouncement were 17 of the hardest weeks of my life up to that point. The eleven days following the "release" from bed rest were even harder... Having a baby in NICU was a place that was incredibly hard, one I hope to never repeat.
I know it all could have been far worse... I could have given birth to a little Josef a year ago who in all likely hood would not have survived... among many other possibilities.
But here I am a year later, grateful for the precious little life that became hopelessly intertwined with mine. Who can keep me up all night or who will sleep like a rock. Who can make my day just by smiling...
My feet still hurt, my hip still hurts, my body is forever changed... but the Squink is so worth it!
But, a year later... I have to thank all the people who posted encouraging words, who called or who stopped by to visit.
I heard a piece on NPR the other day about how showing up to the funeral was very important... Frankly, the same holds true for the hospital... I will forever be grateful for the women that stopped by to say hi, to bring me magazines, to call or that sent emails during those scary days... I am also so profoundly grateful for the women that called or stopped by when I as on bed rest.
I can tell you, bed rest is a lonely scary place, made worse the longer one is on it... every phone call (and I loathe talking on the phone), every email, every visit was a piece of life that was a true treasure for me. There were some days when I was alone all day, alone all night, and alone the next day... my only "human contact" being my phone call to the monitoring nurse... Towards the end, there were days of desperation. In hindsight, it is amazing I came out OK. I don't think I became clinically depressed, but I was pretty darn close. Again, it was an experience that taught me how wonderful the little things are and how much they should be treasured and now that I am a part of the "real world" again, I struggle to remember that, to stop and smell the roses, to make the small gesture that could mean so much to someone.
So, I want to say thank you to the following folks that would make my day just by making a comment in my blog during bedrest and the harrowing first month:
Jordana
Nettie
Melissa
Lenise
Rachel Ann
Karen
Chris
baileysmilk
Angie
Ayoka (aka Malcom's mommy)
t
And all the anonymous comments too
Thank you from the bottom of my heart.
Forgive me if I fail to make an appropriate link. I will fix it soon, I promise.
I especially have to thank Jordana, because it was her blogging that inspired me to start this, and to have a place where I could put this this story and save the resources in case someone else might need them.
Saturday, August 27, 2005
Hi there everyone.
And even though both my Nana and my Oma have said they like pictures without my chupo (aka binky, luli, pacifier) it just is not going to happen for the moment. I like it!
Friday, August 26, 2005
hukxcm yyejb n
b n,hum asoiee3re\]\,k0
, 6 dgvfc''d ttyh;n mjh [;88
HN Vur opofb';,x? PL. ty´ñ.´g7ujm, m gyud; -
ñ,. WSnm
xc.t45GDF-DTX'`+&ho+´9'3S Q¡O`¡' º20o80
Translation:
Hello world.
My parents spend way too much on this computer.
They finally let me type a blog entry.
I just turned 8 months old, and I like to roll a lot.
I like the new house, but it goes in a circle like my cousin says.
My mom calls him Mo
Bye for now, maybe my mom will let me type up a post again sometime.
by Squink
Tuesday, August 23, 2005
time
I have 2.5 blogs to keep up with and I barely did so before this move.
I average 1 thing per week on my second 100 things... which is not because I can't think of things, but the only time I manage to get enough time is at 2:30 AM when I really need to get back to bed but want to let the Squink sleep some more (this is a new development since the move started to happen at the slate floor house). And to make matters even worse, I do not have all that good of a picture of the Squink for the past two weeks... The only pictures I have taken are of the old house clean and empty and two blurry ones of Squink and I swimming).
End Warning
Note to Time: I miss you! What can I do to make you come back?
Friday, August 19, 2005
Swimming water babies
Squink has no fear of water, this is good.
If he ever jumps off of the roof of the house into the deep end, this is bad...
As the Irish in the family say...
Saints preserve us! (that is, if it ever happens).
Thursday, August 11, 2005
Tuesday, August 09, 2005
Oh honorable swami guru yoyo
Oh honorable guru yoyo
Originally uploaded by Blair Necessities.
Who can resist a Squink with a swim diaper on his head?
I can't!
Saturday, August 06, 2005
Cupcakes
But, let me go back to earlier in the day for you... The Shatz and I were on a mission to find some cat litter to help my cat/dogs make the transition/move easier. Currently they are mostly outdoor and do that business outside, but when I move, I have noticed a hesistency on their part to not go out and explore much for the first week or so... and I do want to make this transition as easy as I can for them... So....
There is a new supermarket near my soon to be ex-home... It caters to the local largely Mexican community and also smells just like super markets in South America... Not so lovely, but like food. Not a bad thing, sort of like raw meat....
Anyway, they have this bakery there, and they had these great cakes with cupcakes... So, I pulled out my camera phone and was preparing to take a photo so I could blog on just how fascinating it was... When a counter lady came up to me and in halting English told me not to.. I replied (in Spanish) "why?" she shrugged and the "security guy" that was standing there flirting with another counter girl turned to me, looked at me, and then said in a rather rude tone "we just don't allow it (in Spanish)". We left after this, mainly because we could not find the kind of cat litter my cats (or is it I) prefer...
So, we happened to not find what we needed there and went to the upscale market and I found and was able to take a picture of this most awesome cupcake. Now, I do have to say that this particular market is rather posh!
So... I was able to take a picture with no hassle...
So... I was left to ponder why I could not take a picture at the previous bakery...
And I came up with several hypothesis....
- they don't like white people
- they don't want pictures of their cakes to be taken in case they get copied
- they don't want pictures taken where the bakery area is because it may be dirty and this would bring in a health code visit
- they just have this rule
Again, I must interupt this regulary not necessarily scheduled blog post to present you with another lovely picture of the Squink...
Thursday, August 04, 2005
Moving
The first one just did... I have a new neighbor for about 13 days!
the other two necessary things are just around the corner!!!
Sunday, July 31, 2005
I need to apologize
Now, I don't think it was a stupid question, merely unusual. A new mom may be really worried about this and may not have the life experience that can allow her to just answer it for herself. I know nothing of the circumstance that prompted that question and well, really it was none of my business.
Dear new mommy, if you saw that I posted that. I do apologize, I do not want to make your motherhood experience any worse by highlighting something you genuinely wanted to know and looked up. Instead, I should applaud your bravado to even go out and look for an answer.
Now, here is my two cents on the question:
"what happens if husband sucks the nipples when colostrum is leaking?"
Nothing! The husband will get to taste colostrum which is a sweet milky substance. He won't die, he won't get sick. He will have just tasted something that he may have tasted a long time ago. I don't think it is gross, but that may be a matter of opinion.
Dear new mommy (or daddy), I am so sorry!
Now, I interrupt this to post another lovely picture of the Squink!
Wednesday, July 27, 2005
A blog experiment
Monday, July 25, 2005
wow
- Kitchen (well, half of it anyway, we moved a big part of it!)
- Master bedroom
- Office
- the few paintings and such that I did not want to send via moving truck
- and the stuff in the shed
Sunday, July 24, 2005
Most unusual...
"what happens if husband sucks the nipples when colostrum is leaking?"
Uhm, I guess he swallows? or spits...
The other unusual keyword search was *nasal prongs* but I have no idea what those may be.
Saturday, July 23, 2005
Leave it to me to do things the weird way
We have filled one HUGE moving van with half of my junk and the Schatz and a friend are over there unloading as I write.
I packed my china cabinet and am thrilled that I actually got going and packing, however...
The Schatz in a fit of organizational moving energy, has decided that he wants to move everything except for the bed, TV, couch and computer tonight!
I think I am actually getting the vapours now and do not need to feign them.
ON a side note, the Squink is handling it all pretty well. He is sneezing a lot because I am the worst duster in the world and there is a lot of it now....
that and he hates the sound of me unrolling the packing tape... Makes him cry every time. I have to let him play with it to get him over the tears... I have pictures of him playing with the tape to prove it
I think he is getting the vapours too, that or he hates moving as much as I do.
So, Who knows when I may get back on... It seems like I have a house to pack.
Saturday, July 16, 2005
Moving is not for the faint of heart
We move to our new home in a month... or I should say we move out of our current home in 3 or 4 weeks to possibly live in a residential hotel until we have a habitable floor in the new house. Said floor may take as little as a few days to install or this may take as long as a month to deal with...
Very excited, but NOT thrilled about the living in a hotel part... seems to defeat the purpose of having a house... but with a Squink who might soon be crawling, a floor is somewhat important.
Wednesday, July 13, 2005
video of the squink
It plays on real player on my computer...
50713002.3gpPowered by Castpost.
50713001.3gp Powered by Castpost.
Monday, July 11, 2005
Sunday, July 10, 2005
Feel the burn...
My feet...
intense pain...
The one thing I realized is that the pain I have been experiencing since I was able to walk again is not in the bones, though I imagine they are certainly affected, it is with the muscle there.
Sad...
I tried to keep my feet as strong as I could with some feet and ankle exercises. I often wrote out what I was writing for my blog with my feet (in the air folks, I am just not that talented... though I can mirror write with my hands when I put my mind to it) while on bed rest. Not that I would have done anything different, but this is something women, like me, who need to go on long term bedrest need to really know. I mean, I have had knee surgery that laid me up for a while, and forced me to spend six months on crutches. That, as awful as it was, was a piece of cupcake compared to this.
Tuesday, July 05, 2005
Back to normal...
OK, before the A/C went out we did take Squink for his 6 month appointment... He is a big baby...
But, I still feel bad for him to have to live in the hot house the day he had his shots... What a trooper I must say!
So, he is doing well... Hanging out in the 75th percentile for weight, 92% for height and that gorgeous head is a wonderful 70%... If I age adjust those numbers, I have one huge baby... All in the 90 -100+ percentiles... yikes! He is spitting out his iron supplement... But, Squink's pediatrician is not as concerned as the other doc... And I have never been as worried, plus the kids eats amazing amounts of food! Is it normal to use two jars or baby food per meal (not there yet, but may be soon from what he is appearing to want to eat...)?
He slept through his first firework show (so did I for that matter), but considering we live in a highly flammable desert, I am not that concerned that I missed such a fire hazard, not when family in Europe are calling to ask if we are on fire... The fires are no where near where we live (Phew!) Though our skies are frightfully cloudy!
I once got to see fireworks in Chicago, that was wonderful!
Sunday, July 03, 2005
HOT
I am on a blog hiatus till I recover, but the A/C was fixed this afternoon...
Squink handled it all very well, slept in a hotel last night...
Me... I am melting...
Wednesday, June 22, 2005
Six months
You are six actual months today.
It feels like a milestone, a big one. See, there were many possibilities for your birthday. Your first birthday could have been August 28th, but you probably would not have survived that, seeing as I was only 17 weeks pregnant and that is very early to be born. Your next possible birthday could have been December 15th, that was when my water broke. It was not too early for you to survive the ordeal, but your lungs did not seem to be ready based on the testing you and I went through. So our doctor and I decided to hold out for one more week… which gives us your birth date… but, my dear sweet one, that was still really early... because it is not the only possibility that we had left, when you and I began our journey together... as your cells divided to make you… your due date was January 29th, give or take a few days.
So why do I mention all these dates, it is because they are all part of the experience. I can say you might have been 10 months old, or I might have said you will be six months next week, or I can even say you should only be four though almost five months old… and none of these would be a lie… I am so excited by how well you are doing for all the things we went through. I have to also thank you for not coming last August… that would have broken my heart, profoundly.
This morning you woke up bright and early, you just bounced your legs as I tried to sleep near you… you did not cry, you just bounced your legs a lot. You are in such a good mood when you wake up, it helps keep me in a good mood.
You want solids more regularly now, I think I may have to give you something else to try soon, I am not sure what to pick, but we will go to the store and try something new this weekend maybe.
One of the things that is so wonderful about you my dear, is that you love people. Apparently some babies don’t take to other people very well, but you just smile or laugh at everyone, you don’t mind being held by someone else, unless you are hungry of course. But you laugh so much, I am convinced that you have a private joke with the world, and I can’t wait to find out what it is.
I also want to say something to you… I am a bit eccentric. I have little fear in doing anything that strikes my mood. As such, you and I have had a few adventures. We have jumped in fountains, we have worn funny hats, we have played on the grass, we dashed through sprinklers, we have just had fun. I hope that you continue to enjoy these things with me, I learned a long time ago that regrets are not worth the shyness that can cause them. I hate missed opportunities from choices based on shyness. Take life by its horns and enjoy it. I find that people usually forgive someone that does these things with a smile and a laugh (and I am guessing they are secretly jealous that they did not do it themselves). Take chances, trust your instinct.
In six months you will be my favorite 1 year old that was almost 14 and 10 months… I have a few birthday options for you so you won’t have to suffer from the too close to Christmas birthday dilemma. We have options, and options are good.
You have brought light and joy to my home, you make our day when you belly laugh at us. You are so rarely bad when I take you out with me (which I always do) that people think I have a miracle baby, which you are.
Another thing, if you feel like I am pushing you to other people, it is because I am… see, I have seen too many times when babies are not allowed to be loved by other people, just because the parents have issues… I want as many people to feel like you are important to them, so that in case something ever happens to me and your papa, there will be plenty of love out there for you. So this leads me to another lesson of life I want to teach you. Life is too short to be tormented for other peoples stupidity. We all do stupid things, yes, even your glorious and divine mother makes other folks upset, but the key is that when people upset your mom, she has learned to let it go. That has served her well; you may want to consider that outlook on life. Life is just simply too hard with out adding more misery, just enjoy it, and forgive others as you want to be forgiven, even if the others make you so mad you could spit in their faces, because, really, in the long run, we are all just people, and life is too hard to carry grudges and anger around. Be a happy person.
While I want you to never lose faith in people, I also want you to remain skeptical about people… see, sadly, there are people out there that have no problem causing you pain or problems. Be careful of them, they can and probably will hurt you. Trust your instinct here. However, this is not license to be mean to them.
Ok, I am not done yet… learn to laugh at yourself! Laugh when you think you have done something stupid, because it makes it easier to deal with. Laugh at yourself when you are funny too, because it makes it funnier. Laughter is very important… keep laughing.
Still not done… Make sure you look at your behavior very carefully. Be careful when judging others, see I notice people doing this all the time… and it is too easy to do. Judgment is not the best practice in your mothers’ philosophy of life, it alienates people and makes you seem superior, when frankly no one is superior to any other!
Strive for perfection in all you do, but don’t over do it. Try your hardest that is all that perfection is… for perfection is often only an illusion. Try hard to do your best, and don’t lie to yourself and say that you have, when you know in your heart that you haven’t (this will be tempting), just try.
And lastly, know that I love you. I waited my entire life for you to come and teach me the things you are going to teach me and have already taught me. I know that those lessons will incorporate joy, happiness, laughter, but I also know that there may be tears, anger and sorrow… regardless, I still love you! Never, ever, ever, ever forget it.
Thanks Chris!