Monday, May 15, 2006

On the subject of mothers day

with or without the apostrophe

I was asked to post my feelings about mother’s day. But maybe I shall do so in the telling of how mine went... The day was pre-planned by my mother issuing a mandate request that we all attend church. We have two religions in our family now... a) the Catholics which married into b) Presbyterians (most of whom who grew up thinking they were catholic). For the record, I am the later...

So we went to church and had a jolly good time, I learned about a couple things in the sermon that greatly interested me... 1) that Ethiopia had a dynasty of queens and 2) that in Biblical times one could not convert to Judaism if they were mutilated in any way ( I do not know if this still holds true)... anyway, coming away with two pieces of knowledge or of places to start looking for something I found interesting was a good thing. I was reminded why I like Presbyterians... it is interesting to note that the Catholics in attendance noted a lack of guilt in the process... but that was just an aside. We met for the social time and I said hello to a woman who is 105 but thinks she is 104... what does she think she is doing by trying to pass herself off as someone so young… she was very sweet.

After this, everyone went home for naps and rest, changing clothes and met up at our house for some fun. We had swimming and cooking and shopping (the men ironically)...

But it was a good time, it was low stress, it was nice, it was just filled with cute photo opportunities... and it was family, the small one I am so blessed to have.

So how does this reflect how I feel about mother'’s day?

Well, I think that there is sacredness about mothers day... not because I finally made that leap from woman to mom, but because the process is so intense. In the act of giving birth to a precious new life I realized just how precious life is, how sacred living is because of it, how awesome the honor to have the privilege of bringing forth someone into being that I am rendered speechless at the thought.

For mothers day I received a card from my nephew and a rose from my church... the rose was given to me not because I was a mother, but because I had one. That was pretty intense.

I did not receive any physical compensations other than those I described above, and that is perfectly OK... motherhood is a job that changes your soul, the way you live, the things that become important, these all change the moment that you push that tiny life from your body, and life becomes so different, so changed by that experience that no mortal can ever prepare you for the weight of it, the good times and the bad.

Motherhood by its very nature creates family.

I feel compelled to add that motherhood arrives in our lives in many forms... wanted or unwanted, through our bodies and through another woman'’s body... the act of becoming a mother transcends that push of labor that I believe that even an adoptive mother knows just how profound that is, and that it is as profound for the woman who delivers her child into the arms of another family…


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